Speculative Stretch

Two of my favorite words are: What If

In the context of ideation, like a brainstorming session, “What if” can be very powerful. Everything from “What if we didn’t…” to “What if we tried…” can lead to big, surprising yields. “What if” allows us to plug in about anything, really change it up, really upend things.

I wish I had an idea generator about now. Here’s a functional one. At least it demonstrates the concept. Slap together unlike things and see what evolves from it. Even the silliness it comes up with seems pedestrian: Henry Ford had access to Robots? ..the most advanced technology of today was hypnotism?

I suggest starting with something super simple, then keep asking, keep stretching, far from the bounds that bind you.

What if butter wailed when it melted?

What if butter wailing was used for attracting whales?

What if wailing butter was revered?

What could a stick of butter wail about?

What commercial interests would be drawn to this butter?

What if people could interpret the wailing cries of butter?

What if we found solace in the butter’s song of sorrow?

What if butter wailed only at the dinner table?

How would wailing butter affect one’s evening meal?

Who would buy an album of wailing butter?

What mood might wailing butter establish if an album of it were played on a date?

Could people come close in imitation of wailing butter?

Could purists tell imitation wailing from the real thing?

Could computer-generated butter wailing pass for true butter wailing?

What call to action might wailing butter cause?

I think I put together wailing and butter because butter seems otherwise inert. I paired some very unlikely words. However, think of the scorching sizzle sound of butter on a hot plate. Consider buttered corn on the cob doing its thing.

Personally, I think such exercises work best when the writer doesn’t get to choose the word pairing at all. I like it best when there’s no tapping out, no turning back. “These two words are your lot in life, make something of them.” A list of what if’s going forever further afield is easy and fun for me to make. I understand that some people find doing something like this to be agony. It’s just too hard for them (like math is for me).

Unwrap a stick of butter and hold it near your helmet. You’re weightless in the ship’s cabin, and you’re eager for new direction from your butter stick, which has tremendous navigational powers once outside our atmosphere. When everyone calms down, your butter sings coordinates to guide your exploration of space. You’re in search of just the right combination of fat solids, salt and water, and no device can get you to these treasures like a singing butter stick.

I urge everyone reading this to just cut loose with a couple of unlike words and let the what if’s fly. It’s fun and affordable, too!

Who knows, it might inspire a story.